Come pause a minute,

Sit with me awhile,

and share your thoughts...

21 April 2014

How often...

our actions are guided by what others may think of us (in reality no one really has that kind of time or energy to think about what we are doing), or by what others may do in a similar situation (but we are, each of us, guided by our thoughts, and thoughts are our very own personal domain).

How often do we honestly confront what we really want to do deep down? We are so busy whitewashing what we want to do so that we look good in the eyes of people (in whose minds we, in all probability, don't even feature, and even if we do this is our life we are talking about isn't it?), or we are trying to find ways and means of giving our actions a coat of self-righteous paint (who are we trying to fool?), or we devise fantastic explanations and complicated and circuitous reasons for our actions in order to gain the other person's empathy (who really cares?), or we speak with bravado, maybe to prop up our own selves because deep down there is no resonance (who is impressed, anyway?).

How often do we do (or not do) things because that is what we want to do (or not do) - because we believe it will give us happiness - because we know that, for us, it is the right thing to do - because we know it is good for our souls.....? We spend our time and energy craving for recognition or approval from other people whereas all we have to do is to look into our own hearts and souls.....This is the difficult and scary part but it is the only thing that will bring fulfillment and peace...

15 April 2014

It's Vishu today...

it is also Poila Baisakh, Jaya Varsham, Baisakhi and Bohag Bihu....

A bringing in of another New Year...

Every community has a variation of a dish which is a mix of something sweet, something sour, something chilli hot, something that is both sweet and sour, and something bitter.

An apt metaphor for what life will serve up, wouldn't you say....?

Why then, do we balk at having fun or having a good loud laugh, or question the happiness that life gives us, and instantly groan and moan when ills befall us, or wallow in self-pity when bad times come?

The expression 'amalgamation of identities...'

has gone deep...

What courage Asra Q. Nomani must have to write a book like 'Standing Alone in Mecca'. And it is a courage that we can all borrow from. She says, 'I spent my young adulthood trying to understand the amalgamation of identities within me.'

While some people can synthesize their various identities, some of us struggle with them because, often, we do not know what we are battling. Our various identities keep wrestling with each other, and often we do not know how to manage them, let alone make them cohesive, causing us to live fractured lives.

I found that writing down my various identities - those that describe me at birth, those that define me from the place that I was brought up in, and those that I acquired along the way due to my experiences - helped me a great deal towards sync-ing them. I realize I need to - have to - must - make them harmonize with each other to create the melody that would define me.

10 April 2014

Awww......very difficult to say goodbye...

to the adorable Archie and his friends Reggie and Jughead. Later, Betty and Veronica also joined the gang.

And how can we leave out Hot Dog??!!!!!

This genre of Bubblegum, Rock and roll is never going to go out of fashion, especially for those of us who belong to that 'age' of Sugar, Sugar by The Archies. Writing the words for those of us for whom this song still spins its magic, and puts stardust in our eyes....

Sugar, ah, honey, honey
You are my candy girl
And you got me wanting you
Honey, ah, sugar, sugar
You are my candy girl
And you got me wanting you

I just can't believe the loveliness of loving you
(I just can't believe it's true)
I just can't believe the wonder of this feeling, too
(I just can't believe it's true)

Ah, sugar, ah, honey, honey
You are my candy girl
And you got me wanting you
Oh, honey, ah, sugar, sugar
You are my candy girl
And you got me wanting you

When I kissed you girl I knew how sweet a kiss could be
(I know how sweet a kiss can be)
Like the summer sunshine pour you sweetness over me
(Pour your sweetness over me)

(Oh, sugar)
Pour your sugar on me, honey
Pour your sugar on me, baby
I'm gonna make your life so sweet, yeah, yeah, yeah

Pour your sugar on me, oh, yeah
Pour your sugar on me, honey
Pour your sugar on me, baby
I'm gonna make your life so sweet, yeah, yeah, yeah
Pour your sugar on me, honey

Ah sugar, ah, honey, honey
You are my candy girl
And you got me wanting you
Oh, honey, honey, sugar, sugar
Honey, honey, sugar, sugar
You are my candy girl

09 April 2014

Maya Angelou speaks to all of us women...

Phenomenal Woman

    Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
    I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size
    But when I start to tell them,
    They think I’m telling lies.
    I say,
    It’s in the reach of my arms,
    The span of my hips,
    The stride of my step,
    The curl of my lips.
    I’m a woman
    Phenomenally.

    I walk into a room
    Just as cool as you please,
    And to a man,
    The fellows stand or
    Fall down on their knees.
    Then they swarm around me,
    A hive of honey bees.
    I say,
    It’s the fire in my eyes,
    And the flash of my teeth,
    The swing in my waist,
    And the joy in my feet.
    I’m a woman
    Phenomenally.

    Men themselves have wondered
    What they see in me.
    They try so much
    But they can’t touch
    My inner mystery.
    When I try to show them,
    They say they still can’t see.
    I say,
    It’s in the arch of my back,
    The sun of my smile,
    The ride of my breasts,
    The grace of my style.
    I’m a woman
    Phenomenally.

    Now you understand
    Just why my head’s not bowed.
    I don’t shout or jump about
    Or have to talk real loud.
    When you see me passing,
    It ought to make you proud.
    I say,
    It’s in the click of my heels,
    The bend of my hair,
    the palms of my hands,
    The need for my care.
    ’Cause I’m a woman
    Phenomenally.
    Phenomenal woman,
    That’s me.

All you women....and me

05 April 2014

It is critical...

exceedingly so, in fact, that we come to terms with our situation, no matter how bad/sad/unfortunate it is. Wishing it away is not going to happen, trying to replace it is a risk (take it if you feel strong enough), finding ways and means of countering it or changing it - there's no surety, maybe no possibility either, that it can or will happen. Nor is it helpful to you if you get onto the 'why is this happening to me' track. The I-haven't-harmed-anyone-why-is-this-happening-to-me, doesn't work - it won't give you either the peace you need in your heart, nor does it give you any answers, simply because there are no answers for some things. The I-deserve-something-better, or this-can't-be-happening-to-me, or I-too-am-entitled-to-happiness thoughts only become more and more stressful and stress-producing as they go round and round in your mind and heart.

Difficult as it is - terribly, terribly so, sometimes - it is best to force yourself to come to terms with the bad/sad/unfortunate things in your life. And since Life moves in paradoxes, often, this is the only way your heart and mind will be free to make the best of your own life. At the end, you have to account for your own life, not for the actions of someone or for circumstances who/which made your life unbearable.

We are on this earth:
To BE HAPPY
To MAKE OURSELVES COUNT
To GIVE BACK TO LIFE THE LOVE IT GIVES US
To BE WHOLE

Wonderful words to spur all of us on:

You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.
~ Maya Angelou

03 April 2014

I remember being told that...

friendships break, or develop deep seemingly unrepairable cracks, though it can be patched up, the crack is always there...as in, the mark where it has been patched up always shows. Not a happy or uplifting thought, for all relationships go through cracks, breaks, and patch-ups. Some have many cracks and breaks that are patched up.

So, imagine my happiness and relief when I came across this:

“When the Japanese mend broken objects, they aggrandize the damage by filling the cracks with gold.  They believe that when something’s suffered damage and has a history it becomes more beautiful.”
~Barbara Bloom

Breaks, deep cracks can be repaired.................. and plugged with gold!!!! Gold-filled patchwork!!!